Comments on: A Letter To My Daughter About Fighting Back http://www.thehotline.org/2013/02/a-letter-to-my-daughter-about-fighting-back/ 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or TTY 1-800-787-3224 Fri, 24 May 2013 05:12:37 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.4.2 By: HotlineAdmin_AB http://www.thehotline.org/2013/02/a-letter-to-my-daughter-about-fighting-back/comment-page-1/#comment-25187 HotlineAdmin_AB Sun, 19 May 2013 04:56:27 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=4498#comment-25187 Anna Thank you for your comments. Our blog is a cooperative effort. I think if you research a bit you will find what works best for you. It sounds like you have real passion for writing, best of luck in your efforts. Anna

Thank you for your comments. Our blog is a cooperative effort. I think if you research a bit you will find what works best for you. It sounds like you have real passion for writing, best of luck in your efforts.

]]> By: Anna http://www.thehotline.org/2013/02/a-letter-to-my-daughter-about-fighting-back/comment-page-1/#comment-25066 Anna Sat, 18 May 2013 15:17:15 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=4498#comment-25066 Very good blog! Do you have any suggestions for aspiring writers? I'm planning to start my own blog soon but I'm a little lost on everything. Would you propose starting with a free platform like Wordpress or go for a paid option? There are so many options out there that I'm completely confused .. Any ideas? Many thanks! Very good blog! Do you have any suggestions for aspiring writers? I’m planning to start my own blog soon but I’m a little lost on everything. Would you propose starting with a free platform like WordPress or go for a paid option? There are so many options out there that I’m completely confused .. Any ideas? Many thanks!

]]> By: HotlineAdmin_KK http://www.thehotline.org/2013/02/a-letter-to-my-daughter-about-fighting-back/comment-page-1/#comment-18314 HotlineAdmin_KK Sat, 16 Mar 2013 06:05:59 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=4498#comment-18314 We would like to remind everyone sharing on our blog to be aware of our Community Guidelines, and to please be respectful of other people's experiences and choices. Please read our Community Guide Lines here: http://www.thehotline.org/community-guidelines/ We would like to remind everyone sharing on our blog to be aware of our Community Guidelines, and to please be respectful of other people’s experiences and choices.

Please read our Community Guide Lines here: http://www.thehotline.org/community-guidelines/

]]> By: HotlineAdmin_KK http://www.thehotline.org/2013/02/a-letter-to-my-daughter-about-fighting-back/comment-page-1/#comment-18313 HotlineAdmin_KK Sat, 16 Mar 2013 06:03:02 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=4498#comment-18313 We would like to remind everyone sharing on our blog to be aware of our Community Guidelines, and to please be respectful of other people's experiences and choices. Please read our Community Guide Lines here: http://www.thehotline.org/community-guidelines/ We would like to remind everyone sharing on our blog to be aware of our Community Guidelines, and to please be respectful of other people’s experiences and choices.

Please read our Community Guide Lines here: http://www.thehotline.org/community-guidelines/

]]> By: Anna http://www.thehotline.org/2013/02/a-letter-to-my-daughter-about-fighting-back/comment-page-1/#comment-17237 Anna Thu, 14 Feb 2013 09:01:14 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=4498#comment-17237 I wish i was this brave I wish i was this brave

]]> By: laynee http://www.thehotline.org/2013/02/a-letter-to-my-daughter-about-fighting-back/comment-page-1/#comment-17236 laynee Thu, 14 Feb 2013 06:54:56 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=4498#comment-17236 This quote is my favorite and I can relate: "And it didn’t happen again because saying these words out loud made it real–and I could see with brutal clarity that it was up to me to not let it happen." This is a great story and you're very strong and brave for writing this to your daughter. I too have a daughter whom is currently in diapers. I'd like to write to her someday, something similar to your letter about standing up for herself. I am in the early steps of getting out of a DV relationship. I completed step 1: getting out of the house. I don't want to press legal charges on him though. It is hard because we have a child together and I still love him very much. Thank you for sharing your story. It's nice to know that I am not alone in this kind of situation. This quote is my favorite and I can relate:
“And it didn’t happen again because saying these words out loud made it real–and I could see with brutal clarity that it was up to me to not let it happen.”

This is a great story and you’re very strong and brave for writing this to your daughter. I too have a daughter whom is currently in diapers. I’d like to write to her someday, something similar to your letter about standing up for herself. I am in the early steps of getting out of a DV relationship. I completed step 1: getting out of the house. I don’t want to press legal charges on him though. It is hard because we have a child together and I still love him very much. Thank you for sharing your story. It’s nice to know that I am not alone in this kind of situation.

]]> By: HotlineAdmin_VW http://www.thehotline.org/2013/02/a-letter-to-my-daughter-about-fighting-back/comment-page-1/#comment-17230 HotlineAdmin_VW Thu, 14 Feb 2013 05:04:53 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=4498#comment-17230 Dear Betty, Thank you for contributing to the ongoing conversation. It seems you are searching for answers about DV, in all the right places. I'm a big fan of Lundy Bancroft's work, too. But then I caught your quiet question at the end of your blog response. Often being aware of what is happening to someone we love and witnessing the cruelty of one human to another is an extremely difficult burden to carry. So, take care of yourself, so that you will have the enery and composure to help your daughter when the time is "right". The Hotline is always here for you, too. My best advice is to stay in regular communication with her, be supportive of her and what she needs from you-maybe even ask, What can I do for you today?" Try to avoid any ultimatums, if she needs information or some help you can't provide-direct her to The Hotline.Trust her to know when she is ready to recognize her situation. Remember to tell her you care about her and her happiness, and you are there for her. Be prepared to help her with safety planning. There is a website that provides information for family and friends of a person experiencing DV and tips for helping with safety planning: www.womenslaw.org</ul>, look under the tab"Helping Others". Of course--The National Domestic Violence Hotline (1-800-799-7233) is answered 24 hours a day 7 days a week to more fully help you help her. Dear Betty, Thank you for contributing to the ongoing conversation. It seems you are searching for answers about DV, in all the right places. I’m a big fan of Lundy Bancroft’s work, too.

But then I caught your quiet question at the end of your blog response.

Often being aware of what is happening to someone we love and witnessing the cruelty of one human to another is an extremely difficult burden to carry. So, take care of yourself, so that you will have the enery and composure to help your daughter when the time is “right”. The Hotline is always here for you, too.
My best advice is to stay in regular communication with her, be supportive of her and what she needs from you-maybe even ask, What can I do for you today?” Try to avoid any ultimatums, if she needs information or some help you can’t provide-direct her to The Hotline.Trust her to know when she is ready to recognize her situation. Remember to tell her you care about her and her happiness, and you are there for her. Be prepared to help her with safety planning. There is a website that provides information for family and friends of a person experiencing DV and tips for helping with safety planning: http://www.womenslaw.org, look under the tab”Helping Others”. Of course–The National Domestic Violence Hotline (1-800-799-7233) is answered 24 hours a day 7 days a week to more fully help you help her.

]]> By: Flynn http://www.thehotline.org/2013/02/a-letter-to-my-daughter-about-fighting-back/comment-page-1/#comment-17220 Flynn Wed, 13 Feb 2013 11:57:43 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=4498#comment-17220 It sounds so similar..stay strong It sounds so similar..stay strong

]]> By: Betty http://www.thehotline.org/2013/02/a-letter-to-my-daughter-about-fighting-back/comment-page-1/#comment-17209 Betty Tue, 12 Feb 2013 16:47:00 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=4498#comment-17209 I agree with the person who wrote that the abuse does not have to be that severe , to prompt a person to get out of the relationship/marriage ! It is sometimes hard to recognize for what it really is. This may have already been shared here : the book by Lundy Bancroft is invaluable ! The title is Why Does He Do That ? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men. (and of course it applies to women who operate out of anger and being controlling too ). He also gives the signs to look for in a relationship . And a question: how does one help a daughter who is in an abusive marriage and refuses to even acknowledge it ? I agree with the person who wrote that the abuse does not have to be that severe , to prompt a person to get out of the relationship/marriage ! It is sometimes hard to recognize for what it really is. This may have already been shared here : the book by Lundy Bancroft is invaluable ! The title is Why Does He Do That ? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men. (and of course it applies to women who operate out of anger and being controlling too ). He also gives the signs to look for in a relationship . And a question: how does one help a daughter who is in an abusive marriage and refuses to even acknowledge it ?

]]> By: Mary http://www.thehotline.org/2013/02/a-letter-to-my-daughter-about-fighting-back/comment-page-1/#comment-17207 Mary Tue, 12 Feb 2013 15:46:37 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=4498#comment-17207 It is possible that you survived your ordeal so that you could save your daughter, or maybe even the life of someone else who reads or hears your words. You can change the world another persons world with your words as certainly as you changed your own world with your actions. Thank you for sending them out to us. It is possible that you survived your ordeal so that you could save your daughter, or maybe even the life of someone else who reads or hears your words. You can change the world another persons world with your words as certainly as you changed your own world with your actions. Thank you for sending them out to us.

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