Comments on: Father’s Day & Survivor’s Guilt http://www.thehotline.org/2012/06/fathers-day-survivors-guilt/ 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or TTY 1-800-787-3224 Fri, 24 May 2013 05:12:37 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.4.2 By: HotlineAdmin_AM http://www.thehotline.org/2012/06/fathers-day-survivors-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-16825 HotlineAdmin_AM Wed, 09 Jan 2013 04:31:16 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=3812#comment-16825 I-got-out, Thank you for contributing to our blog community. It’s definitely normal to feel alone and to experience abuse without knowing it’s abuse. You call call the National Domestic Violence Hotline 24/7 to get support and information about local resources. It’s completely confidential and anonymous. Please call from a safe phone when you have privacy. I-got-out,

Thank you for contributing to our blog community. It’s definitely normal to feel alone and to experience abuse without knowing it’s abuse. You call call the National Domestic Violence Hotline 24/7 to get support and information about local resources. It’s completely confidential and anonymous. Please call from a safe phone when you have privacy.

]]> By: I-got-out http://www.thehotline.org/2012/06/fathers-day-survivors-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-16823 I-got-out Wed, 09 Jan 2013 01:37:49 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=3812#comment-16823 I have been suffering from this without knowing it had a name. I thought I was alone. Now to find help so I can fully enjoy my freedom. I have been suffering from this without knowing it had a name. I thought I was alone. Now to find help so I can fully enjoy my freedom.

]]> By: HotlineAdmin_CH http://www.thehotline.org/2012/06/fathers-day-survivors-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-8134 HotlineAdmin_CH Thu, 26 Jul 2012 19:58:01 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=3812#comment-8134 Andrew, Thank you for being a part of our blog community. I am sorry to hear that you’ve experienced abuse in your past. Regardless of gender, abuse is abuse and is never acceptable. You are right in thinking there is not enough research out there about male victims and the different experiences that they face. It has only been in the past few decades that domestic violence has actually been talked about and legitimized. Those of us in the thick of the movement know that men are absolutely vulnerable to abuse and fully believe that they should have access to support services just as women should. Unfortunately, lawmakers and judges are always on the same page. Here is a good resource that talks about the distinct experiences that male victims face (http://www.nhcadsv.org/male_victims.cfm). We encourage you take action in order to raise awareness about this issue and speak out to affect change in your community. Thank you again for participating in our forum and offering your support. HotlineAdvocate_CH Andrew,
Thank you for being a part of our blog community. I am sorry to hear that you’ve experienced abuse in your past. Regardless of gender, abuse is abuse and is never acceptable. You are right in thinking there is not enough research out there about male victims and the different experiences that they face. It has only been in the past few decades that domestic violence has actually been talked about and legitimized. Those of us in the thick of the movement know that men are absolutely vulnerable to abuse and fully believe that they should have access to support services just as women should. Unfortunately, lawmakers and judges are always on the same page. Here is a good resource that talks about the distinct experiences that male victims face (http://www.nhcadsv.org/male_victims.cfm). We encourage you take action in order to raise awareness about this issue and speak out to affect change in your community. Thank you again for participating in our forum and offering your support.

HotlineAdvocate_CH

]]> By: Andrew http://www.thehotline.org/2012/06/fathers-day-survivors-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-8062 Andrew Thu, 26 Jul 2012 11:26:33 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=3812#comment-8062 Jen, You and your boyfriend is not alone. The bias society has aganist us male victims only revictimizes us. It's very difficult and painful for a father to watch his kids be abused and be prevented from protecting his children by society. It's bad enough that he is criminalized or fears criminalization if he defends himself. There really needs to be adequate resources for men that can help us cope, and that offer healthier avenues in dealing with abuse aganist us. There needs to be legitimate research into the problem men face alongside women's research. It's not really the "men versus women" problem that feminist's have made it into. It's a problem that affects everyone and continues in cycles for everyone who is affected. Please seek all counseling your new family needs in order to minimise the suffering, and to prevent the branching of the abuse cycle where you can. Don't give in to the darkness, hold onto what's good. Jen,
You and your boyfriend is not alone. The bias society has aganist us male victims only revictimizes us. It’s very difficult and painful for a father to watch his kids be abused and be prevented from protecting his children by society. It’s bad enough that he is criminalized or fears criminalization if he defends himself. There really needs to be adequate resources for men that can help us cope, and that offer healthier avenues in dealing with abuse aganist us. There needs to be legitimate research into the problem men face alongside women’s research. It’s not really the “men versus women” problem that feminist’s have made it into. It’s a problem that affects everyone and continues in cycles for everyone who is affected. Please seek all counseling your new family needs in order to minimise the suffering, and to prevent the branching of the abuse cycle where you can. Don’t give in to the darkness, hold onto what’s good.

]]> By: HotlineAdmin_SS http://www.thehotline.org/2012/06/fathers-day-survivors-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-6794 HotlineAdmin_SS Sat, 14 Jul 2012 00:55:59 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=3812#comment-6794 Hi Jen, Thank you for sharing in our Share Your Voice Blog community. Statistically 1 in 4 women and 1 in 9 men in the US will be a victim of domestic violence at some point in their lives. Sadly, it sounds like your boyfriend did not get the support that he needed. If your boyfriend would like to call and talk with an advocate, he can call The National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233. Advocates understand that there are male victims of domestic violence and can offer support. Additionally, an Advocate may also be able to identify local resources in his area that help male victims through counseling or support groups. You are welcome to call as well, as Hotline Advocates are also there to support family and friends of domestic violence victims. Thank you again for sharing in our Blog Community, HotlineAdvocate_SS Hi Jen,

Thank you for sharing in our Share Your Voice Blog community. Statistically 1 in 4 women and 1 in 9 men in the US will be a victim of domestic violence at some point in their lives. Sadly, it sounds like your boyfriend did not get the support that he needed. If your boyfriend would like to call and talk with an advocate, he can call The National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233. Advocates understand that there are male victims of domestic violence and can offer support. Additionally, an Advocate may also be able to identify local resources in his area that help male victims through counseling or support groups. You are welcome to call as well, as Hotline Advocates are also there to support family and friends of domestic violence victims.

Thank you again for sharing in our Blog Community,
HotlineAdvocate_SS

]]> By: Jen http://www.thehotline.org/2012/06/fathers-day-survivors-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-6790 Jen Fri, 13 Jul 2012 18:25:23 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=3812#comment-6790 The vast majority of information out there about domestic violence is geared toward women who are abused by men. I would really like to see more resources for men who are victims of domestic violence. My boyfriend was in an abusive marriage, and every time he reported her to the police in order to protect himself or their children, he was brushed off or told things like, "I can't separate a mother from her children," by a judge. Over the course of his marriage, he learned that he couldn't count on law enforcement or the justice system, so he stayed for 20 years to this woman (who regularly hit him and threatened to stab him while he slept, among other things) for fear that if he left, she would get custody, which would not be good for him or the kids. There is a completely different set of problems for men in this kind of situation, and it's so rarely addressed. The vast majority of information out there about domestic violence is geared toward women who are abused by men. I would really like to see more resources for men who are victims of domestic violence. My boyfriend was in an abusive marriage, and every time he reported her to the police in order to protect himself or their children, he was brushed off or told things like, “I can’t separate a mother from her children,” by a judge. Over the course of his marriage, he learned that he couldn’t count on law enforcement or the justice system, so he stayed for 20 years to this woman (who regularly hit him and threatened to stab him while he slept, among other things) for fear that if he left, she would get custody, which would not be good for him or the kids. There is a completely different set of problems for men in this kind of situation, and it’s so rarely addressed.

]]> By: HotlineAdmin_SS http://www.thehotline.org/2012/06/fathers-day-survivors-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-5695 HotlineAdmin_SS Sat, 30 Jun 2012 02:03:47 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=3812#comment-5695 Hi Thank You, You are not alone! Thanks for sharing in our blog community and please know that you may conatct the National Domestic Violence Hotline anytime for support at 1-800-799-7233. HotlineAdvocate_SS Hi Thank You,

You are not alone! Thanks for sharing in our blog community and please know that you may conatct the National Domestic Violence Hotline anytime for support at 1-800-799-7233.

HotlineAdvocate_SS

]]> By: thank you http://www.thehotline.org/2012/06/fathers-day-survivors-guilt/comment-page-1/#comment-5584 thank you Fri, 29 Jun 2012 14:34:42 +0000 http://www.thehotline.org/?p=3812#comment-5584 Thank you for writing this, I thought I was the only one who felt this way. Thank you for writing this, I thought I was the only one who felt this way.

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