National Domestic Violence Hotline Blog

Domestic Violence Examined on Dr. Phil

Yesterday on a Dr. Phil episode entitled Crossing the Line, Dr. Phil counseled two couples experiencing verbal and emotional abuse in their marriages.  Often when domestic violence is discussed, it’s assumed that physical violence is involved.  This episode serves as a moving reminder that abuse can take many forms — emotional, verbal, sexual, economic, psychological, spiritual and physical.

The men on this show believed that they were not committing domestic violence because they were not inflicting physical pain on their wives. Although there are no visible scars when domestic violence is non-physical, other forms of abuse still cause long-lasting damage and pain.

Abuse is never acceptable.  Review the signs of abuse and please call The Hotline if you have questions or concerns.  We are here to help.

Please call The Hotline at 800-799-SAFE (7233) or 800-787-3224 (TTY).

5 replies
  1. Mary Kate says:

    I was severely assulated in my sister and brother-inlaw’s home in Albuquerque, New Mexico. I went there for a visit and saw where my sister had removed most of the antiques from our wealthy mother’s home in San Francisco. They were present there in their Albuquerue home. I was steered away and housed elsewhere. My sister is (was) extremely dear to me. The love of my life. Now she lies about what you’ll read.

    I questioned them that evening about the furniture I found by accident. An argument ensued in their kitchen. The brother-in-law grabbed me, and began to beat me senseless. He broke 7 ribs and tore my costal cartiledge. Unforunately, I declined a police report, just wanted to feel safe and locked myself into their guest cottage and settled in on my broken, crunching torso. He was to undergo prostate cancer surgery the next day, and I was to fly the next dawn to South Bend Indiana to meet not 1 but 2 huge maximum sized moving vans to move to two different homes in texas. This was October, 2007. Coming up on three years.

    Did see the emergency room the following day. in Michigan/Sout Bend. , they found the broken ribs, multiple contusions on both arms, upper, and lower. I now want this guy put away. HE BEAT ME LIKE A HOCKEY PLAYER. i WEIGH HALF OF HIS WEIGHT, ME, 160, HE 320. He, a PH.D. in Nuclear Science. I too have an MBA.

    Are my rights over? I still have the Xrays, many people, including a son who is a male nurse, reports, etc.

    I AM SO SORRY. I JUST WANTED TO GET THE HELL OUT OF HELL AND DIDN’T WANT TO GET MORE BEATEN AS THE POLICE COULD HAVE AND SHOULD HAVE ARRIVED.

    Meanwhile, his daughter doesn’t speak to him over past anger issues, and his (gay) son says he has major issues and needs help. Did I miss my singular opportunity to charge this guy? Lots of therapy on record also recalls what happened. Is my window closed in New Mexico.??

      • Diane says:

        Hi Esieh,

        I’m so glad you reached out on our NDVH Blog. We are a 24 hour confidential and anonymous hotline. There are alot of services we can provide for you over the phone. When you call our hotline, you can speak to an advocate that is able to answer any questions you may have about Domestic Violence, offer support, be a listening ear and provide resources where you may be able to get assistance and support at the local Domestic Violence Program.

        Please feel free to call us, you can reach us at 1-800-799-7233.

        -NDVH Advocate

    • Joan says:

      >>DIDN’T WANT TO GET MORE BEATEN AS THE POLICE COULD HAVE AND SHOULD HAVE ARRIVED.<<
      So very sorry for your painful and frightening experience. I'm sorry I cannot answer your question of whether it is too late to do something about this 3 yrs later but I wish someone would,

      Just wanted to point out the police problem – and yours is a perfect example. TOO OFTEN, domestic violence victimes turn on their rescuers. My son is in law enforecement, came across a large man chasing his girlfriend and screaming, threatening, inflicting damage on her car and preventing her from leaving in her vehicle. She was frightened and asked my son for help. He tried talking to the abuser, then tried to drive away but was unable: the abuser then attempted to attack my son with a large, heavy object. My son drew his issued firearm and demanded the man step back – he did not – my son fired and the abuser subsequently died of his injuries. My son is now being prosecuted for murder. Why? Because the girlfriend/victim has now changed her story and believes her abuser was the best guy that ever lived! Go figure. VICTIMS: Please know what you're doing – get help and advice from the various organizations who, I believe, now have some responsibility to speak up for the police as well. They put themselves in extreme danger each time they respond to a domestic violence call. Many will tell you these calls are among the worst.
      Good luck to you. I'm glad to know that you survived your attack and with some psychological healing, I'll trust you will be okay. God bless.

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